If you are on your second or subsequent marriage, it might be surprising to learn that it's statistically more likely to end in divorce than a first marriage.
Why is that? We all learn lessons from our mistakes, and people generally go into second marriages a bit more aware of what they want and don't want in a spouse and more cognizant of their own flaws. Shouldn't future marriages be more likely to last? Marriage therapists provide some interesting insight into the phenomenon of why they aren't.
More Complicated Finances
Couples in a first marriage are more likely to be on an equal financial footing. They may have similar incomes and assets and therefore split expenses evenly. In a second marriage, there are usually more assets (and perhaps debts) involved, and one spouse may have significantly more than the other. Therefore, couples in second marriages are more likely to fight about money, even if they have more than they did in their first marriages.
If one or both spouses has children from a previous marriage, that adds a level of complication. Both of you may be dealing with dividing time with your kids with your own ex as well as trying to develop a relationship with your new spouse's children. Even if everyone gets along, this can put a significant strain on your marriage and cut down on the time you have for yourselves.
Many relationships that lead to second marriages begin before the first marriage is over. If you or your new spouse was still married when you got involved, there's always going to be a question of whether he or she would cheat on you as well.
You may think that you've learned a lot from your first marriage and vow not to repeat the same mistakes that contributed to its dissolution. You may also think you've found a spouse who is void of all the problems you had with your first mate. However, there are plenty of other issues that can crop up. If you expect that your second marriage will be virtually conflict-free, you're setting yourself up for disappointment, and perhaps yet another divorce.
If you're heading into a second marriage, it's best to be as prepared as possible. Premarital counseling can be highly advantageous. Moreover, a prenuptial agreement is more important than ever so that both spouses can protect their assets and clearly differentiate what belongs to each of them.
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